I just want to write...

I just want to write, but don't quite know what to say. There is so much on my mind lately, so I don't know where to start or if I should even try to get these thoughts out of my head. Since it's the month of LOVE, I will just start with what I feel the most right now. I feel my Saviors love. Not just for me, but for all his children. When all else has failed in my life, he has ALWAYS been there. Even when I couldn't see it. We don't always have our friends or family, or even parents that we can turn to and it has always been good to know that he IS there and that he UNDERSTANDS us. How different my life would be if I didn't cling to him in times of despair. How different my life might be if I didn't acknowledge his hand in my life. It is so hard for me to see my children hurting, or my friends in pain in times of trials or darkness. When I feel these feelings I can only help but think of my Heavenly Father and my Savior and the pain that they feel for each of us. I'm sure their pain is greater then mine. I wish that I could help my friends and family through their hardships and know that God wants that too. He wants us to turn to him in these hard times. Why is it then that when we struggle, we sometimes push him away? We don't feel WORTHY of his love and help? We are too prideful? Do we just not believe? Do we let the other experiences we have had with him continue to influence us? Or do we question everything all over again when trouble comes our way? Do you ever just fall with complete trust that your Savior is there with those arms and STRONG hands WAITING to catch you and hold you tight? Sometimes I fight it. I fight trusting that he is really there but when I close my eyes and just trust him...things change. They change for me inside, and that's the first step isn't it? I wish I could help others take that first step. Trusting the Lord can be hard, but it is always worthwhile.